I have now reached (and passed) that hurdle all marrieds must mount sometime. I think it came pretty early, if comparing to average American couples, but I have now spent a holiday with no family. (And I was still trying to get used to spending holidays with in-laws!) But, after our big move to New York mere weeks ago, we couldn’t really to travel back home just for Easter dinner with the fam.
This isn’t a pity-party post, however. The difficulty with holidays, especially when married, is being forced to make choices. Who do you celebrate with? Whose invitation do you turn down? Much more complicated than just my side versus John’s–which grandparents? How many cousins are where and how long has it been since we’ve seen them? Will anyone be hurt on a personal level if we turn down their invite? Etc. Living far away has a freedom in it because there are no expectations. I never had to call my mother and tell her that, for the first time in my life, I wouldn’t be home to worship and picnic this Easter. She already knew, therefore that conversation never had to happen.
We did have an incredible, albeit quiet, Easter. We actually received an invitation to Easter Dinner from a co-worker of John’s, but had to turn it down because John works Sunday evenings. So, with the limited time we had, we set out to make Easter as relaxed as possible. Church was alright–I’d be lying if I called it incredible. I always thought Easter would be a hard service to ruin, but pumping the music volume to twice the appropriate level is one way to do it. My headache didn’t last too long, however, so my complaint stops here. The weather was beautiful, the sermon challenging, everyone friendly and happy.
When we got home, I made my first-ever batch of scalloped potatoes and ham and a fruit-topped salad with my mother-in-law’s recipe for vinaigrette dressing.
We watched an episode of Mad Men while the food cooked, then fully enjoyed our meal and conversation together.
I thought the day was over when John left for work, but he was covering the opening of a nearby Drive-In theater and took me with him. We weren’t able to stay for the movie (regrettably), but I got to watch my husband in action as he interviewed the owners and approached visitors. Eventually, he dropped me off at home before heading back to the office. He wrote an incredible article on the American tradition of Drive-Ins and the expense harms the digital age has brought owners. (I’d attach the link but the paper won’t let you access it w/o a subscription.) Poor boy, though. He’s supposed to work until 10 Sundays but, because of the late nature of drive in shows, was unable to get interviews til late. He got home after midnight. 12:20, to be exact. (Then had to be up this morning for normal day-shift work.) These past weeks as a newspaper wife have taught me to expect this. I spent Easter Evening reading a (rather unoriginal) free Kindle book while my hard working husband pounded computer keys as fast as his brain could form sentences.
I did miss my family. To be honest, it felt more like a great weekend than the Easter holiday. But, regardless, I am blessed and was reminded of that when this story from my home region broke. While I didn’t know these boys personally, I know several of their family. If you believe in prayer, send some of that comfort and miraculous power this family’s way on such a terrible, tragic Easter weekend.